A new year is upon us, which means it's time to grow up, and frankly, I have to admit that 2019 hasn't been very generous to most of you and myself. It was a challenging year. A few fun and memorable moments but the hard times hit us deep.
Okay! Enough with my whining about how terrible the year went. If you decide that you deserved better in 2019 because others got better, you will suffer.
If you decide that 2019 was indeed a terrible year, but you will thrive to become better and more hardworking in 2020, then you will be better off with your pain.
If you read my last post, then you'll understand the above paragraph as it entails our belief when it comes to pain and suffering.
In this post, I'll be giving you five beneficial advice that will help you to become a better you in 2020 If you chose to heed them.
If you've read my book, then you'll know that I'm a negative self-help type of person. And my advice are going to hurt you and but also help you think straight at the same time. Here goes my five tenets for a better new year.
Okay! Enough with my whining about how terrible the year went. If you decide that you deserved better in 2019 because others got better, you will suffer.
If you decide that 2019 was indeed a terrible year, but you will thrive to become better and more hardworking in 2020, then you will be better off with your pain.
If you read my last post, then you'll understand the above paragraph as it entails our belief when it comes to pain and suffering.
In this post, I'll be giving you five beneficial advice that will help you to become a better you in 2020 If you chose to heed them.
If you've read my book, then you'll know that I'm a negative self-help type of person. And my advice are going to hurt you and but also help you think straight at the same time. Here goes my five tenets for a better new year.
1- Start saving money now! Not later.
I spent my teenage years as a reckless kid. Seriously. I had no regard for managing money, I spent unwisely. I didn't care about reading a bunch of business books to learn about money either. Hell, I didn't even bother getting a job.
It was just a 'receive and spend' mentality. Well thanks to growth and adulthood, I now value money and know the value of every cent. Which brings me to my first advice for you in terms of savings and earnings.
- Make it a priority to pay down all of your debts as soon as possible.
- Keep an emergency fund. There are people who became financially ruined by health issues, lawsuits, business deals. Etc. It's painful when you fall ill unexpectedly and not be able to pay your medical bills or that of a loved one.
- Don't spend unwisely. Don't spend money frivolously unless you're rich or you were born into a wealthy home.
- And finally, don't invest in anything you don't understand. Don't trust stockbrokers. Study investing before you invest.
The point is clear. Save early and save as much as possible.
2- Start taking care of your health now! Not later.
Maybe your parent didn’t scold you to eat your veggies when you had less sense, but they sure as hell warned you to eat fewer surgery snacks.
We all know we’re suppose to take care of our health. We all know we’re suppose to eat better and sleep better and exercise more.
The way you treat your body has a cumulative effect. When people get diagnosed and suddenly realize that they have a terrible sickness that causes their body to break down.
Well, news flash, it’s not that their body suddenly breaks down in a week, it’s been breaking down all along without them noticing. This is the time to slow that breakage.
The advice here isn’t just the motherly type of advice that tells you to eat your veggies and avoid sweets.
I’ve read and watched documentaries from cancer survivors, heart attack survivors, people with diabetes and blood pressure problems.
They all said the same thing: “If I could go back, I would start eating better and exercising, and I would not stop. I made excuses then. But I had no idea.”
3- Don't spend time with people who don't treat you well.
Okay! This is not a joke. A lot us have spent time with people we don’t even like, simply because we don’t want to feel left out or look weird. But here’s the thing, weird is good and learning to enjoy your solitude is even better.
But if you’re not the solitude type, then seriously, stop spending time with people who don’t make you happy or treat you well.
Learn how to say “No” to people, activities and obligations that don’t bring value to your life.
An interesting regret that most adults have today is that they wish they could go back and enforce stronger boundaries in their lives and dedicate their time to better people.
What does that mean specifically?
Don’t tolerate people who don’t treat you well, period. Don’t tolerate them for financial reasons. Don’t tolerate them for emotional reasons.
Don’t tolerate them for the children’s sake or convenience sake. Stay away from miserable people. They will consume and drain you.
As someone wiser than me once said, “Selfishness and self-interest are two different things. Sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind.”
When we’re in our 20s, the world is so open to opportunity, and we’re so short on experience that we cling to the people we meet, even if they’ve done nothing to earn our clingage.
But when you reach your 30s, you would’ve learned that good relationships are hard to come by, that there’s no shortage of people to meet and friends to be made, and that there’s no reason to waste our time with people who don’t help us on our life’s path.
4- Invest in your family and those you care about. It's worth it.
Spend more time with your folks. It’s a different relationship when you’re an adult, and it’s up to you how you redefine your interactions.
Your parents are always going to see you as their kid until the moment you can make them see you as your own man.
Everyone gets old. Everyone dies. Take advantage of the time you have left to set things right and enjoy your family.
Family is the big new relevant topic for this decade for me because you get it on both ends. Your parents are old, and you need to start considering how your relationship with them is going to function as a self-sufficient adult.
And then you also need to contemplate creating a family of your own.
Grow up! Seriously. Get over whatever problems you have with your parents, or brothers or sisters or peers. Fix broken relationships and move on.
In my book, I went deep in detailing family values and showing readers how important it is to keep those bonds guarded for as long as you can.
Your parents are always going to see you as their kid until the moment you can make them see you as your own man.
Everyone gets old. Everyone dies. Take advantage of the time you have left to set things right and enjoy your family.
Family is the big new relevant topic for this decade for me because you get it on both ends. Your parents are old, and you need to start considering how your relationship with them is going to function as a self-sufficient adult.
And then you also need to contemplate creating a family of your own.
Grow up! Seriously. Get over whatever problems you have with your parents, or brothers or sisters or peers. Fix broken relationships and move on.
In my book, I went deep in detailing family values and showing readers how important it is to keep those bonds guarded for as long as you can.
5- Be kind to yourself. Choose you.
You heard me! Grab your wallet, grab your stuff and go out with yourself and have a good time with you. Buy yourself clothes, eat by yourself, go to the movies alone.
Be a little selfish and do something for yourself every day, something different once a month and something spectacular every year.
At some point in your life, you're going to have to choose your happiness over everything else. Conversely, at some point, you're going to sit and wonder if there's anybody out there that gives a shit about you. That's just life.
Don't sweat the small stuff. And it's almost all just small stuff. When confronted with a perceived problem, ask yourself, "Is this going to matter in five years? If not, dwell on it for a few minutes, then let it go.
Conclusion
We must all face the inevitable difficulties of life.
As a teen, I loved playing video games, but now I've recognized over the years that they're an escape for me. Not something I hold as a core value.
Happy New year!
Isa.
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